Why whisky is a manly drink

So yeah there's been a post about whisky before but whisky is awesome so fuck it. I'm here today to tell you why whisky is manly as fuck. It'll turn your life around, all you need to do is try it! Yeah I'm trying to become a motivational speaker but it's really tough when you tell people to drink and then they get lazy.

Ok so let's get this shit started. The Irish are awesome and that has a lot to do with how bloody good their whisky is. They love it so much that the name whisky actually means 'water of life' in Gaelic.Everyone knows that water is the basis of all life on earth and without water we'd all die, so, technically, whisky is life. Of course that may have just been a marketing ploy in order to sell more whisky but eh.

Here's an awesome picture that explains...some other shit. I hope you all know that scotch is just the Scottish version of whisky...if you didn't then you have two choices. 1) Leave. 2) Get off your ass, head down to an establishment with some booze and sit around a table playing poker while smoking cigars and sipping this damn fine concoction.

                         

I would point out that the 'developing and interest in sex' point is more from the perspective of women to you, as long as they're straight obviously... But there have been reports that the sheer manliness exuding from certain individuals after a few glasses of the good stuff has been enough to turn lesbians straight. Food for thought. 

For men, giving one another a bottle of whisky shows that you respect them as a man and encourage displays of this manliness through the consumption of whisky. When was the last time you looked at a guy drinking whisky and thought "That guy's a fucking pussy!" The answer is never because real men drink whisky. It's like manliness in a bottle and if you have aspirations of becoming a man all you need to do is pour yourself some water of life and down that shit!

I've taken the time to ask groundskeeper Wille if it's required for a man to drink whisky and he replied...

Look how manly he is, all thanks to whisky. He'll punch your face off if you say otherwise.

Anyway, that's my time for today. Drink up and make sure it's whisky! 

-Bassam